Woefully Uninformed TIE Company require Actor / Research Assistant – Touring
Job: Actor / Research Assistant
Artform: Theatre In Education
Paid?: All of our money is going on petrol
Health Matters Theatre are a new company, making theatre for schools and colleges about medical ailments and issues, with the aim of proving to young people that Health Matters.
We’re looking for a Research Assistant, for our new play for male teenagers on the subject of Prostate Awareness. Working title “PROSTATE OF MIND”. We’re really excited about doing a play about Prostate Awareness, as we think it is an important Health Matter to highlight.
Now, we know that the Prostate is a small doughnut or something up a man’s bum that could kill him if a doctor doesn’t prod it with a finger. EVERYONE KNOWS THAT. We’re looking for someone who can “fact up” our script a bit. For example – does it have to be a doctor that does the prodding, or can it be anyone? Does the prodding have to happen at certain times, like that guy who had to push the button in Lost, or can you just prod it a load of times and then you’re okay?
What is a Prostate? Is it a muscle? In my mind, it’s something like a fleshy grenade. Why does it want to kill a man, when it is a part of a man? How does it kill him? Does it release some kind of toxic fluid? Or does it just blow up?
Why don’t men have their Prostates removed if they’re so much trouble? Would that cause problems with pooing?
Do women have Prostates? Or do they have enough trouble on their hands, what with the ovulating and everything?
Basically, we don’t want to scare male teenagers, but we want them to be informed about their Prostates, in precisely the way that we aren’t. If you have the time and inclination to find out these things, and are not scared by pictures of things in medical textbooks, then we would like to hear from you.
Oh, and you can be in the play too. In fact, we’ve earmarked the role of “BOFFIN” for you. The part is of a clever man or lady, perhaps a Doctor, who knows the answer to difficult questions. They will use a lot of jargon, so it’s important that the Boffin is played by the Research Assistant so none of the rest of us have to say long words. The rest of the cast of five actors play characters affected by Prostates in our day-to-day lives – a fisherman, a weathergirl, a bank manager, and a woman committing adultery with a fisherman.
The Research Assistant / Actor is important, and so will only have to drive the van once every two shifts. This is so they can check facts on an iPhone while we’re driving.
We’re looking forward to hearing from you.
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